Am I Obsessed?

Sean P Carlin said in his post today, (among many other worthwhile things), ‘If you’re blessed enough to have one, you know that passion inevitably becomes obsession, and obsession, like addiction, wants your complete attention—for better and for worse.’

This connection of passion to obsession was an epiphany for me. If you’ve poked around my blogs and their pages very much, then you’ve discovered I am always creating things. I have lots of interests and since I like to start and finish things, I tend to accomplish some pretty major projects and goals. In the last few years I’ve realized I’m very driven.

Because my interests primarily lie in the arts – writing, visual art, photography – I’ve always thought they were passions. But at the same time, being a very methodical person by nature, I was put off by that term if it’s used in a sense of being carried away. I don’t like the idea of being out of control.

For some reason, when I read Sean’s post today, I realized that these kinds of passions (the Arts, and the need to create) are those fanatical, crazy, out-of-control passions. And I’ve let my writing become an obsession. Here’s the Google Search Result for the definition:

Google Search Definition

Yup, I’ve gone a little crazy. I’m out of control! I’m alright with that to a degree – if the results are healthy and good. Certainly sharing artwork, beauty and other emotional expression that causes connection and/or learning or even just entertainment can be good. It’s not healthy to bottle things up or go against your heart. But it’s the Compulsion, Mania, and Addiction parts of the definition that worry me.

I’ve gotten fat from sitting writing so much. I spend more money than I should at Cafe’s where my writing time is most inspired and least interrupted. I’m barely at home, which means I often let domestic projects slide. I skip workouts too often. Yup, it’s no longer healthy. And, though I’ve been slowly admitting this to myself, I’ve been unwilling to significantly change my ways. Sound like addiction? Definitely unhealthy.

I’ve become obsessed. Hmmm…

Do you have something good that took over your life? What did you do about it? Did you find balance, or are you okay with being obsessed?



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